Author Brené Brown who writes often of the power of vulnerability tells of a time she opted to let her guard down in front of an audience. She confessed to those listening something strange in her life.

She told them that sometimes she will sits by her sleeping child’s bed, amazed by the gift and wonder of that precious life. Then all of a sudden the delight gives way to dread; she becomes aware of how fragile life can be. She knows in that moment that in spite of her desires, she will not always be able to protect that little one.

She thought this experience was hers alone; but the audience with sobs of recognition shared that they knew this fear in their own lives.

There is a scene in a Harry Potter movie where Molly Weasley, mother of many, encounters a boggart. A boggart in the Potterworld is a beast that attacks you by taking on the shape of your greatest fear. You are terrified of spiders? It becomes a gigantic spider. You fear a zombie? It hobbles toward you as the living dead.

When Molly meets a boggart in a time of violent conflict in her world, the beast becomes crime scenes with her beloved family members lying dead. She is paralyzed by this vision, sobbing hopelessly on the floor.

Our loss when loved ones die is always deep. We grieve even when someone we love dies at a ripe old age. But how much more when death comes reversing the natural order of things as a parent must watch one of their children (or grandchildren) die?

This summer two of our members had to grieve in this way and from conversations with others of you I know many of you  are not strangers to this particular despair. In such times we turn to the God who brings life out of death, asking that we find release from our sadness in the hope the risen Christ offers. But the sting remains.

During the pandemic, loss is real. I have family members who have lost very dear friends to Covid-19. And I think of parents doing what is often done in September, sending their children to school whether that be kindergarten or college. As the children walk away from home, many adults will be visited by Brené Brown’s boggart.

I pray for each of us who long to protect our vulnerable loved ones. I pray to God for protection to hover over those in our care. I pray regularly for each of you whom I long to be with in pastoral care.

“Watch, O Lord, over us all.”

I recall a wise teacher I once had who shared the thought that sustained him after the death of his child. I asked, “How in the world did you go on? How can I see so much joy in you after such painful trauma?” His response was poignant. What he learned in his loss was this:

Life is so fragile, we must celebrate it!

Amen. May it be so.

About Philip Ruge-Jones

After I served for eighteen years as a professor of theology at Texas Lutheran University, my family decided to return to the Midwest where my wife and I grew up, attended college and seminary. Read more...